Terrible Tuesday: Pickles-R-Gross

Pickles are cucumbers soaked in EVIL. There is Toy-R-US, Babies-R-US, I’m going to open a store called Pickles-R-Gross with a support group that will be held once a month for all of those like me.

What do I mean by those like me? Well, we’ve had this blog for about a year and half (holy guac, time flies) and I have never shared with you all my HATRED and aversion to pickles. I know many of you are rolling your eyes and saying, “What does she have against pickles?” The truth is,  I can’t pinpoint what it is about pickles that I hate. Wait, yes I can. I hate the smell, I hate that someone took a perfectly good cucumber put it in a jar of evil and let it sit there. I hate that when a pickle touches something on my plate it ruins it. I hate that I have to have someone on pickle duty in case a pickle is delivered on my plate – literally someone has to remove it from my plate, that is how much I can’t stand the evil cucumber.

Where and when did it start? When I was about 5 or 6, after soccer practice one day, my mom took us through the drive-thru at Krystal because it was a new joint in town. I ate a mini-burger that had pickles, mayonnaise (dennisf is barfing now), ketchup and onions on it. It was disgusting and I think from then on, I hated pickles and have never been back to Krystal. Actually, that’s not true, we went through the drive-thru and pranked my friend and made her order a milkshake, which they don’t make. That was fun. Anywho, back to the nasty – I can’t remember ever eating a pickle after that, so that’s when I started hating them.

I am teased constantly about it. My nephew likes to taunt me when we go to BBQ in S.C. and they have pickles. He throws them on my plate and I am forced to either wipe it up or start over with a fresh plate. I know it drastic, but that’s how severe it is. He’s not the only one, just a good example. The first time I saw a cornishon, I had no idea what it was and I was about to try it and smelled the evil. I threw it down in protest. When I ask for no pickle and someone asks if I am allergic, I just say yes. You want to know what’s even more absurd, I like cucumbers.

I know there are other pickle haters out there. I know I am not alone. What do you hate?

If you want to join my support group email me at picklesrgross@gmail.com. Also, there is a “I Hate Pickles” group on Facebook, which I am now a proud fan of. https://www.facebook.com/pages/I-Hate-Pickles/72260382123

Tags: Death to pickles, Food hate, I hate pickles, pickle juice, Pickles are cucumbers soaked in evil, Pickles are gross, Pickles are nasty